• rab@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        The dad still said happy birthday and I love you only to get that text back. Older folks are exposed to a lot of propaganda and many are brainwashed (the hint in this case is the “God bless you”). Without more context I’m hesitant to call him an asshole.

        Based on this small exchange I’d be more inclined to say they are both assholes.

        It’s just sad that they can’t look past this and love each other regardless.

        • Yulia@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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          1 year ago

          Sad that dad can’t toss away his transphobia and accept his daughter.

          Daughter’s behavior is completely justifiable tho. If I was in her place, I would not look past bigotry and basic lack of respect to me

          • rab@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            How much exposure do you have to these bible people though? I mean the dad was taught that even being gay sends you to hell. Probably never finished grade 9.

            I’m from a small conservative town and it’s hard to fault the brainwashed people either IMO. A lot of them are good people who have been severely manipulated.

            • Yulia@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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              1 year ago

              How much exposure do you have to these bible people though?

              I’m from Russia. I’ve seen more than enough conservatives. And more than enough brainwashing (though more in a context of a war)

              In the end, I think, this is not really relevant. Transphobic parent, ultimately, hurts more than helps (even if they do it out of love for you), and people who do you more damage than help should be cut off

            • TheActualDevil@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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              1 year ago

              Oh, well I guess they win then. Deep down they’re probably good people, so we just ignore their bigotry and allow it to proliferate further and continue to make the rest of the world a worse place for people I care about.

              Fuck that. I cut out my family for being bigots. I told them specifically why and I refuse to take their phone calls. You have to let people know that those beliefs are wrong and let them know that there are social consequences for continuing to believe them. America didn’t pass the Civil Rights Act by waiting until people just came around and agreed with them. They said “This is wrong, and now illegal.” and made them deal with the consequences (Kinda. It’s still America and still pretty racist so…)

              Point is, change doesn’t happen by ignoring shitty behavior. This kind of behavior needs to be confronted and shut down every time. EVERY TIME.

              • Cethin@lemmy.zip
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                1 year ago

                To add, MLK thought passing the civil rights act was a mistake after it was passed. It didn’t go far enough, and it passing pretty much ensured nothing else would be done in addition. Sometimes something that looks good on the surface is actually damaging. Just because this person’s father suger coated their bigotry (in this particular message at least) doesn’t solve the problem that they’re a bigot and making their daughters quality of life worse.

        • lapis@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          1 year ago

          The hint in this case is “God bless you”

          That’s actually the abuse showing through. It’s intentional passive aggression and a manipulative speech pattern. It’s meant to imply, “God bless you, even though you’re breaking his rules and making him sad and probably going to hell”.

          And before you ask, I was raised evangelical, was deeply involved in ministry, went to bible school, and even worked at a church for a few years; I know how these people think because I was one until I saw the light and ditched their religion. The number of times I’ve seen “I’ll pray for you/them”, “God bless you/them”, and such used as insults is too damn high.

  • Bloved Madman@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    So you think its OK to send a unsolicited pic of your genitaila, to your dad, given that its because he misgendered you?

    Anyone sending unsolicited pics of their balooga, is never OK… In fact. It could actually be a crime. Neither of you come off well in this interaction.

    • Bloved Madman@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I seem to be getting a good number votes in both directions, to those down voting me, do you think unsolicited cock/pussy pics are OK? Cus if you do, you are the problem. The dad is a bigot and need to correctly educate himself, but OP responded in a way that is disgraceful. They are both deplorable.

        • Bloved Madman@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Clearly you missed my point… sending indecent images to ANY unwilling and unknowing participant is deplorable and could be a sex crime. How is it different to running around a park and flashing people?

          • Dodecahedron December@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            Ahh that one is easy: because it’s not a sex crime. Feel free to tell me the statute if I missed something here. Sex crimes include sexual assault, rape and I beleive harassment, however sexual harassment may be covered by other statutes.

            You um… you have an email account right?

            You uh… ever get spam with unsolicited nudes? Or you know, unsolicited commercial email (spam)? You know how those spammers don’t get fined or thrown in jail? This is because it isn’t a crime, or at least not a well enforced crime.

            “Your honor, after paychologically abusing my child for years they sent me a photo of their nude form, something I already have baby photos of. This as I understand it is a crime.”

            • Bloved Madman@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              You have lost it, you are defending the sending of unsolicited indecent photos to individuals who did not ask, nor want them. Both OP and OPs dad are in the wrong here.

              Defending one person sending an indecent photos to an unwilling recipient is the same as defending them all.

              Leave me alone.

              Also I don’t get spammed with spam emails, I have better controls around how and when I use my email address to avoid being on marketing lists et al.