true.
alt text: “Off work late? Hungry, but don’t want to cook? try taking a few hits of weed and then doing nothing. we can try eating again tomorrow. maybe.”
With a high risk of suddenly just eating 3 bags of chips
With a high risk of suddenly just eating 3 bags of chips
An entire unopened box of breakfast cereal.
i cant imagine eating it unopened is good for digestion.
The box is fine, adds fiber. The plastic bag inside, though…
Mmm macro plastics, yummy in my tummy 😋😋😋
I just found out all my favorite foods are served with plastic. I guess it is delicious, folks!
Kelloggs CEO reading this comment section getting ready to drop another banger
Don’t smoke weed too not to cook. Weed gives you the munchies. Try smoking crack. You’ll definitely don’t want want to cook after that.
Last time I smoked while I was hungry I chased my cat around the house by walking with my hands out towards the cat like a toddler, until he got tired and flopped over
I then picked him up and proceeded to cook and eat with one hand while still holding the cat
You got me there
Gottem B)
One of my cats always beats up the other so sometimes I pick up the victim kitty and chase the asshole cat with her.
Seems like law and order is running smoothly
I’m so glad I didn’t get another cat, my cat turned out to be an asshole so I can’t imagine what kind of mischief another cat would’ve brought
Oh my God I love when you’re playing with them and they get tired and flop over on their side like that!! My cat does it, too! That’s my fucking favorite!!
Also, I like you. You sound fun. I do those exact same things sober, lol. Although a lot of the time when I try to hold her while doing something, she ends up crawling onto my shoulder/neck/back and I have to cook and eat hunched over all weird because of it, often with her happy tail whacking me in the face…but she’s just so damn happy up there and it’s beautiful! How can I deny her that? At least then I have two hands to work with, lol.
Thanks, I like you too. Yeah it’s super adorable when they just decide that they’re done and just flop over
My cat kind of sits up when I grab him. I have to cradle my arm and grab his butt so that he can straighten his front legs on my elbow and he refuses to be held any other way. And the face he makes, it looks as if he was staring off into the sunset from a mountain cliff
In the end it’s either one arm or no cat
Idk about y’all but I’ll eat raw flour when I’m high. Any non poisonous calories are fair game to stoner me.
Edit: I need to teach y’all the art of hyperbole
Just learned this last year!
Flour doesn’t look like a raw food, but most flour is raw. That means it hasn’t been treated to kill germs that cause food poisoning, such as Escherichia coli (E. coli) and Salmonella. These harmful germs can contaminate grain while it’s still in the field or flour while it’s being made. Steps like grinding grain and bleaching flour don’t kill harmful germs—and these germs can end up in flour or baking mixes you buy at the store. You can get sick if you eat unbaked dough or batter made with flour containing germs. Germs are killed only when flour is baked or cooked.
CDC investigated outbreaks linked to raw flour or cake mix in 2016, 2019, 2021, and 2023.
I wouldn‘t put raw flour under „non poisonous calories“ and I guess one does not heat treat the flour they want to eat, when high.
Flour is specifically why you’re not supposed to eat the cookie dough. It can contain E. coli.
Brother, you are third person to say that exact same thing when I was clearly just fucking around in the first place
Impossible. Why would The Assman ever make a joke?
Or you invent weird things to eat. Like Butter Vodka, which is made like this:
- Take a full stick of cold butter out of the fridge and put it in a Colin’s glass
- Pour vodka over it
- Enjoy
Third step is optional, and arguably, asperational.
Anyway, that’s how my brain works on THC. Some would say even without THC.
Yeah. I smoke weed and “forget” to eat. It’s infinitely more probable that I go on a mission and stuff myself with the shittiest food in human history for hours, then instantly regretting it, so I have to smoke more weed. You see where this is going?
Lost 70 lbs this way. Gained it back after I quit lol
… who tf quits staring at the wall?? Are we even allowed to just not do that? How?
Nah i had just learned about lamda calculus and i was holed up in my room fuckin with it
Lul, nerd, just go push a rock in some laser beam, that’s how the cool scientists like Gordon do it.