I dont remember the age, but it was before Kindergarten, thought men came into the house at night to load the next days shows into the TV.
I thought adults actually knew what the hell they were doing.
I always had a suspicion but when I became an adult it was so much worse than I thought
Hahah no, there’s nobody driving the bus
The call is coming from inside the bus 👻
Perhaps we should enlist some bus drivers
We all did…
I thought that when the clerk at the checkout asked, “would you like cash back?” That you could say yes and they would just give you cash straight out of the register for nothing lol.
I figured that most people were very honest and didn’t need the money, so they would just say no thanks and leave it in the register for somebody who really did need it.
Similarly, I thought one could get more money by asking for change. You give one bill, you get more bills and coins in return, it’s gotta be more, right?
Aww that’s adorable 🤣
I thought grownups got paid every day and “pay day” was just a special day when you got more money.
So many things…
I didn’t understand how lie detectors were supposed to work so I thought you could hook someone up and ask something like “does god exist” and you’d be able to get answers to all of life’s big mysteries.
I thought there was a left and right sock
I thought wolverines were mythical creatures
I thought if I tried hard enough I could somehow become older than my older brother like it was just a title or something
Thanks to DARE any time I saw a skittle with the S missing I thought it was drugs even in a newly opened package
I could go on…
I wanted an older sibling as a child and I remember trying to convince my parents they should have another baby. In my mind, if I just waited (my age +1) years, I’d then have an older sibling. It never ocurred to me that I would also age during that time…
I’m surprised an older sibling was something you wanted, usually you want to be the oldest.
In my case I just wanted a friend lmao
I was an only child and I just wanted someone cool to play with me who I could look up to. Also all my older cousins picked on me and I wanted defence lol
Your comment about your brother reminds me that in kindergarten I thought that the line order (alphabetical) had something to do with status. My last name starts with C so I was pretty close to the front, but I had a friend with an A for a last name, so I really wanted to move up.
I told no one of this of course until long after I’d grasped how alphabetical ordering worked myself.
The alphabet is in that order because of the song.
Wait a minute…
If your feet are big enough, left and right socks are indeed a thing
My feet are normalish (well, far too wide but normal length) and my running socks are left and right.
Wide is big. I’d argue that the width is the more relevant dimension.
TIL; wolverine is an actual fuckin’ animal!!!
I hope you’re about 25 because this is basically how I found out lol
My son was PISSED when I explained how his older sister would, in fact, always be older. He was sure he’d catch up.
deleted by creator
You can buy socks that have a left and right, but most don’t.
For example for sport and hiking. Those have support structures that need to work differently for the side they are worn on.
And some brands (Polo) put a logo on alternating sides.
I remember thinking that women gave birth to girls and men gave birth to boys, and being really worried because I (as a guy) didn’t want to give birth.
I’m seeing several posts that are startling evidence for the essential nature of proper sex education, lol.
I thought older girls went to bed one night then the next morning they had boobs
Well, this was when I was like 6 or so; I can’t fault the school system.
Slightly related: all dogs are bots and all cats are girls
all dogs are bots
That’s birds.
Sorry. All dogs are birds.
No silly, birds aren’t real /hj
/hj?
Half-joke (see here)
I imagined something completely different.
Wonder how the world population would look like if this was true
My dad told me that walnuts were owl eggs.
He got in trouble when I stole all the walnuts in the house and wrapped them in nose tissues to keep them warm so they would hatch and I would have baby owls.
… nose tissues? You mean, just regular tissues? Did your dad lie to you about tissues too??
As opposed to, you know, butt tissues 😂
I was thinking cock tissues myself.
That could so easily be heard as ‘butt issues’
Haha this is such a funny lie.
I was trying to figure out what caused wind. I noticed the leaves moving when the wind blew, and I knew that a fan (handheld) also moved wind. So it stood to reason that trees moved causing the leaves to move which caused the wind. And naturally it must be earthquakes that caused the tree to love. And then I thought, we’ll there must be a master tree that started the wind, and the most “logical” place for that tree would be the North Pole.
So, that there was a tree on the North Pole that caused all the wind.
Pretty sure that could be the basis for a series of children’s novels that were eventually adapted into a trilogy (or more) of movies.
It’s a trilogy of children’s books, where the first two get a movie each and the last book is split into 2.
I like your thought process. You might be on to something…
Except for the North Pole, I had the exact same idea. I got to the idea of a single tree controlling things then got my hands on a Red Ryder Carbine-action 200-shot Range Model Air Rifle and forgot about trees.
Meet your soulmate: https://feddit.de/comment/2775718
That sheep and goats were same species. I thought sheep were the girl versions and goats were the boys, like hens and roosters.
Wasn’t until well into my 20s that I finally ran into something that put the spotlight on it… IIRC it was some Farmville type of videogame, which included males and females of both sheep and goats. To me, that stood out the same way a “female bull” or “male cow” would have, so I had a little chuckle at the obvious ‘oversight’. Realized shortly after that I was, in fact, a fucking idiot.
Similar to this: I thought that deer was the male and roe was the female of the same species.
exactly what I used to think!
Depends on your definition of species. Sheep and goats are closely related enough to mate and produce offspring
Can’t wait to get some geep milk
Did not know that. I feel slightly vindicated!
I thought CEOs worked super hard
💀
Some do, but many don’t. Especially the top ones.
deleted by creator
That’s brilliant!
Ha! I did the same thing. Now they’re teenagers and mock me.
My in-laws told my wife that it was just the “music truck”. She had no idea it sold ice cream until she was in high school.
I’m relieved they eventually overcame your fatal deception
Hah! You obviously didn’t learn the value of sending your kids on a wells race across the neighborhood to catch a guy in a truck. If you’re lucky, that’s a goods 20 minutes of peace! Worth every penny.
That adult humans knew what they were doing and had things in hand.
I turn 40 in March and still have no idea what I’m doing. I just make it up as I go.
Sucker! I have a whole 6 months to figure it all out before I turn 40. I’m a terrible procrastinator so I’ll probably just wait until the night before to start really working on it though.
Wait that’s less time than I have. I don’t think I’m the sucker, I think you are.
Dang I misread it as I turned 40 in March. Guess I am the sucker!
Muahahaha! … ?
I thought black and what television was black and white because history happened in black and white. I suppose that means life in colour happened after the invention of colour tv
The invention of color was a big deal
One of my favorite Calvin and Hobbies about this topic.
Tangentially related… The creation of the blue LED was so revolutionary, and took so much effort and science to make, that the guy who discovered how to make blue LEDs got a nobel prize.
deleted by creator
The engineers still can’t get over how exciting they are.
Seems like the next novel prize should go to someone that makes a dim led that doesn’t blink all the time.
My eyes only got 66% of the update.
I think they just brought it back from Oz.
Pleasantville: a documentary
I thought that if enough time passed old photos would turn black and white like how they were b&w in the 80s and turned colour in the 90s.
When I was five or six, I think I must have dreamed that my dad could turn his head around 360 degrees. A few days later I was in the car with my Dad and asked him if he could really turn his head around. He responded “not now, I’m driving.” I took that as a yes. It was years before I realized the truth…
I laughed so hard 😂 not even questioning wth you’re talking about, just going straight for the worldview altering statement. I can only wish I had that much wit and humor.
I thought cats were female and dogs were male. Can you tell I didn’t have pets growing up?
I know a disturbingly high number of adults over 40 that refer to every dog as he/him and every cat as she/her no matter how many thousands of times they are corrected on it.
Have you been around girls and boys. This makes perfect sense. I think the science might be wrong.
I still say this but I know it isn’t true.
deleted by creator
Boy, the trees are really sneezing today.
I did just now contemplate the feasibility of wind turbine amusement park rides. Aside from fixed seating and safety belts, the only real thing stopping that from being a thing are (safety) regulations, no? The blades themselves are probably already hollow and they could be pretty good money makers, even if the power output were diminished because of the heavier weight.
deleted by creator
Perfect. We’ll name it “The Extreme Fighter Jet Experience” lol
Meet your soulmate: https://lemmy.world/comment/3260900
Grew up on a dairy goat farm. I noticed we ate most of the boys and kept all the girls.
I was so scared; I had to ask my mom which one of me and my brothers were they gonna keep.