In the last two weeks, a lot of things have happened which are making a lot of people a lot of scared, and justifiably so. I’m not pretending that my personal situation is more dire than anyone else’s. While some of the things going on do directly threaten my family, they’re still currently at arm’s length.
Someone was talking to me tonight about being scared, and I had some thoughts that might be useful.
Fear is what makes you focus and pay attention, and react to immediate threats. Humans evolved in an environment which is far more immediately dangerous than what we enjoy today. I think that fear is simply part of being human, and that when our brains don’t get to experience dangers, we have to compensate for a lack of fear.
Now that there are “real” things to be afraid of, and we’re so conditioned by personal experience to not be afraid, and we’re still compensating for not being afraid … while being afraid … well, that’s disorienting.
What I have done, what seems to be working for me, goes back to why I started this place here to begin with. Don’t be worried, be prepared.
Worry is one thing, fear is another, of course. For me, I am adding Don’t be afraid, pay attention and act accordingly. Again, I think that fear is what makes us focus and pay attention. Once you’re paying attention, then you can better assess what the actual danger level is, and what your response (if any) should be.
This can be practiced in everyday situations. Example: I was driving the other day, and found myself at a stoplight. Cars in front of me, next to me, behind me. A curb and a steep slope down to my right. I didn’t have an exit path for my car; if something “stupid” had happened at that moment, I would have had to abandon my car and take off on foot.
I wasn’t afraid in that moment, but it came into my head to “look for an exit.” What would it be? It would be running. I estimated that the likelihood that I would need to hoof it before the light changed was insignificant, but I was just a little more prepared than I was moments before.
I feel better thinking about fear as an important and necessary aspect of being human, and instead of trying to avoid it entirely, feeding little pieces to my brain consistently, and then consuming that fear with attention and planning.
Again, there are plenty more people in plenty more dire circumstances than I’m in right now, and I’m not trying to portray myself as some kind of superhero. But I’m finding that this way of addressing my own fears seems to be working for me, and if it works for me, it might work for someone else, too. We’re all going to need a lot of endurance, and figuring out how to keep fear from taking away from that is a good thing.
I am someone who thrives in chaos. I have proven it to myself repeatedly and been in situations most others have not due to my past experiences and work. I am Canadian and the fascist tirade and forceable takeover of government to our South along with the trade war and attacks to our national sovereignty have made me start to plan as well. I can’t help myself. I have started packing a full trauma medical kit for the first time in 25 years. I’m an old man and broken but I have equipment and the skills to use it that are of use in chaos.
I’ve become oddly calm but always on edge which is the most disconcerting thing of all to me. I know this feeling.
Don’t panic until Little t finds out that NORAD is a joint Canada-US venture.
No shit right. Once air defense is gone he’ll be throwing another tantrum. We also have an election brewing and a traitorous cunt as the front runner who your fascists are pulling for of course. A lot of this is ensuring they get what they want from us. As a country we don’t play that game though. This shit brings us together.
I’m far from panic. We hold a lot of cards still. Like you said there are many in more dire circumstances than we. We live a simple life and provide a lot of our own everything. We are stable and have the knowledge, land and skills to adapt. It’s my feelings and preparation for what may come that concerns me. I’m not generally that guy.
I’ve trusted Americans as a whole to do generally the right thing, and that trust has been abused. I can think of many times in my younger years where someone I trusted deeply completely fucked me over. How I felt then and how I felt now are quite similar.
I’m just decades more “long game” today I think.
You’ve set an impractical expectation. At scale people will, at best, produce average outcomes. It’s more often below average.
Today, choosing the “right” thing is a privilege of time and means. It’s not even a practical choice anymore.
You’re worried too much about your feelings. It’s preventing you from discerning wisdom.
That’s what I said:
Am I? Let’s see. A post about the feeling of fear, and what I am personally doing to manage it. A comment thread about what things feel like right now. People have emotions, and emotions have a strong impact on how we interpret goings-on, how we react, and whether we are able to react appropriately or in a timely fashion.
Pretty sure it’s not.
All that said, I sincerely thank you for chiding me. It’s given me the opportunity to review my ideas and vigorously defend them.
Centrist narcicissim.
Now I don’t even know who you’re talking to, because it ain’t me.
J.S. Mill and M. Foucault beg to differ.