A lot of things. I have an anxiety disorder.
Same, fam
It’s never easy, but it does get easier
Unless it doesn’t, but hey, I don’t want to worry you
The smell of blood in the night, the sound of squelching coming from the basement door that I know I boarded up, and the sight of my late wife holding what was once our son.
I think a lot of us can relate.
Loud drunk people being nearby. Drunk people are unpredictable and impulsive and things can get awful really quickly.
The energy in a room full of people.
It depends on the people though, but mostly, nah.
I really don’t like crowds and avoid them as much as I can.
But I really love concerts. When the energy of everyone around you just kinda syncs with the music, it’s one of the best feelings.
2 dudes showing PDA. Really any PDA makes me cringe but 2 dudes has always grossed me out too much to not turn away. Have gay friends, best friend has a gay dad, Im eskimo brothers with a former chick who was a dude waiting to have the surgery to be a dude before any gender related shit was making headlines, I also worked for years as both a chef and a male nurse that gave me a higher than average exposure to gay coworker dudes compared to other industries I’ve worked in. I love them all and love(ed) hanging out with any one of them but when it comes to actually seeing the gay shit, I can’t do it. I gotta turn away or see what’s going on in other rooms. Seeing a dude and a chick or 2 chick’s is more roll the eyes kind of cringe but the 2 dudes is more of a physically grossed out feeling. If that’s homophobic than fuck it I guess I’m homophobic.
This was refreshingly really candid
I don’t feel this way about dudes kissing or PDA, but if I accidentally click the wrong link or scroll past a thumbnail with some explicit gay porn, I feel the exact same visceral disgust.
That’s how I OG confirmed I’m not gay back in the day. Trying to watch gay porn and having my dick shrivel like a frightened turtle; wanting nothing to do with it.
It’s very interesting that despite all of your exposure to gay people that you have this sort of reaction. Why do you think you have this sort of a reaction with two men but not with a man and a woman? Do you think you have any sort of idea?
If you’re interested to work on this within yourself, of course getting professional help with a therapist would be best but you could also try some simple exposure therapy on your own. Maybe watch some shows and movies featuring normalized gay relationships. Use that to slow-drip the normality of gay PDA’s existence into your experience.
Here’s a Rotten Tomatoes list you could browse to get started. I think you might want to look for stuff where you can follow and enjoy the plot as well as see gay characters showing PDA. You can try doing this at your own pace to work on slowly desensitizing whatever cringey bit in your mind is having these homophobic reactions and messing with your ability to deal with public reality.
If you are interested in this idea I’d suggest sticking with mainstream films and avoiding porn. Even though it’s really available and even if porn in general is your thing, porn generally isn’t the best way to constructively work on your own sexual education. I think since it’s PDA you’re dealing with you’d be much better off with stuff that can teach your brain about the human side of PDA in our society, portrayed outside of the performative sex acts found in porn.
What is pda?
I see. Ty!
*then lol
I find perspectives like yours interesting because I experienced something similar when I was a closeted bisexual, and working through internalised homophobia was necessary for me. However, I have gay friends who are icked out by heterosexual PDA, and so I don’t feel comfortable assuming that what you’re experiencing is homophobia without applying a similar lens to what my friends feel (which feels wrong, because as a bisexual, I find both The Gays and The Straights deeply confusing)
Thinking about non-existence.
It’s kinda peaceful, knowing that I’ll just end and nothing will matter anymore for the rest of eternity.
The prospect of living for eternity is so much scarier; basically nightmare fuel.
My own answer is what got me thinking of the question.
People cheering for, happily celebrating or laughing at death or people dying.
At least to me, death is dark, serious, grim and horrible on a very fundamental level. Even if it is deserved or necessary it just isn’t something to be elated about. Human beings dying don’t combine with happy feelings.
I find it literally sickening. Usually it’s been in the context of people behaving horribly (for instance suicide encouragement, terrorism etc.) but todays lemmy feed also brought it out, and really made me think about why it made me feel that way.
Same. I totally get that the victim was a real horse’s ass (to put it very mildly) and about as unsympathetic as they come, but the response here has just been beyond sickening. Let’s just say my “block” button has been quite busy the last couple days.
This might technically count as physical, but when drawing or writing I really hate the texture of some tools or mediums
Dull pencils, dry markers, cardboard, chalkboards (or maybe just chalk) all make me super uncomfortable.
It’s hard to describe. It’s like getting shivers, I hate the sound and feel of it
Ooh yeah that one is a classic
capitalism
Being forced to stop doing a thing I’m in the middle of.
Wet chewing sounds
Weird flowers and about 50% of all things living in the sea
Intrusive thoughts. Ugh I get a lot of them especially about sexual things between friends or something and it’s just the worst. I have to close my eyes hard and use all my tricks to try to get it to stop.
When I watch rock climbing films my palms sweat.
Health insurance company stocks.
