I’m a proud bisexual and I adore our queer culture, so why do I still doubt that I’m allowed to take up this space?
I remember the day I came out to my mum. Standing at the end of her bed one grey and drizzly evening, I used a sudden surge of confidence to tell her that I am bisexual. Initially, she didn’t understand. How could I like more than one gender if at that time I had a boyfriend? I did my best to answer her questions, and fortunately, she accepted me.
But I was still grappling with self-doubt, compounded by casual, maybe even unconscious, bi-erasure from those around me. My friends would joke that the worst thing I could do was end up with a man – I’d be betraying myself, and my attraction to men surely couldn’t be real.
I laughed too, as a bead of sweat rolled down my face. I was an imposter. I wasn’t queer enough. Quick! Someone play Chappell Roan and cleanse me of my sins! Should I overcompensate and date a woman immediately? The pressure to prove myself at times felt overwhelming. I didn’t feel good enough for my own community.
Damn ain’t that the bi experience in a nutshell
And who can forget the classic of some relationships literally ending on the spot when telling a partner that you’re bi
Yup. Been there way too many times. “Too gay to be straight, too straight to be gay.”
It’s extra fun when you’re bisexual and non-binary!
Most expressions of attraction towards me are from “straight” drunk guys telling me I’m cute “for a guy” 😅
I get gay guys telling me that I’m bad for their reputation rather a lot.
The fuck would they know about what “the worst thing for you” would be? They ain’t you! And nobody gets to decide how you experience yourself and your attractions. You’re valid! However you experience your bisexuality, you’re valid. And nobody gets to define your experience but you.
