9 out of 10 dentists recommend Onithy. That 10th dentist was swallowed by a whale with human teeth.

Here’s some bonus weirdness:

“Sever your leg please. It’s the greatest day.”

Onithy looks like its side effects include constipation, diarrhea, heart attack, stroke, weak bladder, sepsis, cirrhosis and nausea. Women should not take or handle Onithy. In rare cases, amputation was required. Do not operate heavy, light or virtual machinery while taking Onithy.

Blue whales have baleen, not teeth. That one is presumably wearing dentures.